Sweet Tea for the Soul: Comforting Stories for Moms

“If there’s anyone who is patient with big messes being made in the harvest, it’s our heavenly Father. He consistently extends grace to us, right in the middle of our messes, I and responds kindly to us time and time again.”

I have four children. (Need I say more?) Their ages are fourteen, twelve, six, and five. And while I’d love to say that things are always smooth sailing, in reality, I run a tight shipwreck. As a working mom, life is so much easier when things are clean and organized and everyone gets along. But that only happens about every March 32nd. Can you relate?

Don’t you sometimes wish you could be like Cinderella’s fairy godmother and wave a magic wand? With a simple “bibbidi-bobbidi-boo,” you’d open your eyes to find that all of life’s messes were magically clean and as shiny as a glass slipper.

When my daughter was two years old, my husband had called and asked if we could have his boss over at the last minute. “Sure, sweetie," I said through a pasted smile and clenched teeth. “No problem at all!" I hung up the phone with ninety-four things on my to-do list, including cleaning the house top to bottom, making a yummy meal, and hopefully brushing my hair before said boss arrived. No problem, right? Rush. Rush. Rush. Clean. Brush hair. Clean some more. (Oh, and make something decent for dinner!)

Needless to say, my day became a harried frenzy to get it all done. And just as I had finished cleaning, ready to head upstairs to make myself presentable, I looked in the dining room and saw little white fluffy things stuck to the walls. What on earth?

I got closer and realized it was bits of dried toilet paper! Stuck to the walls. My sweet two-year-old came waltzing out of the bathroom with another wad of wet toilet paper (please don’t ask how it got wet) and proceeded to stick it to the wall!

With a half-crazed look in my eye, I frantically asked, “What are you doing? I just got the house clean. Why would you do this?”

I will never forget the crushed look on her face . In the saddest, most pathetic way, she started to cry and said, “Momma, I was hepping you keen. I sowy.” Oh. My. Stars.

Instantly, I became the one with the sad face and broken heart, and I started to cry. How could I have responded to her this way? I had been more worried about my house being perfectly clean than I was about her beautiful little heart. I was devastated at how I had responded. I sat on the floor, told her I was sorry for not being patient with her, and told her how thankful I was that she was willing to help Momma clean.

I’d love to say that it was the last time I responded like that toward my children, that I learned my lesson right then and there, that I welcomed messes and recognized the bigger picture of what was transpiring. But that’s not the case. Over the years, I have responded impatiently more times than I can count. I have been more concerned with the messes being made than the memories being formed.

I would love to say that I always live for the beauty of the moment, but I struggle to slow down long enough to do this. As someone who likes her house clean and organized, it’s easier to say no more often than to say yes. But I’m so thankful for God’s grace and patience with me through this thing called motherhood. My daily prayer is that He will fill me to overflowing with the same grace and patience toward each of my children.

Proverbs 14:4 has literally revolutionized the way I parent. It’s a verse I’ve read countless times in my life, but I never really understood or connected with it until a few years ago. It says,“Without oxen a stable stays clean, but you need a strong ox for a large harvest” (NLT).

One day, I came across that verse again, and all of a sudden it clicked! It finally made sense. If I wanted a large harvest—a beautiful, fulfilling life with my family—I would need a big ox (and the mess that comes with it).

The truth is, I want a large harvest! I want my children to grow up learning new things, laughing along the way, creating memories, and feeling peace and joy in their home. But if I’m so strict and controlling about messes, structure, and order, I’ll diminish these experiences for them.

While I’m someone who thrives on crossing things off my to-do list, I’m slowly learning to be more concerned about the memories than the messes being made. I am learning to create a peaceful environment where joy and laughter are plentiful, where things aren’t so uptight, and where I’m not so uptight. Sometimes when my husband and I look around the house, we joke, “It looks like it’s been a ‘big ox’ kind of a day!”

If you’re anything like me and have the tendency to dwell on your faults and shortcomings, I encourage you to stop!

Stop picking yourself apart. Stop beating yourself up for the ways you fall short. Be reminded today of God’s beautiful grace and kindness toward you—right where you are—in your beautiful shipwreck called “life.”

If there’s anyone who is patient with big messes being made in the harvest, it’s our heavenly Father. He consistently extends grace to us, right in the middle of our messes, and responds kindly to us time and time again. Let’s allow His patience and kindness to be what mark us as women and as mothers.